Debunking The False Dichotomy Of High Standards vs Generous Grace At Work
Debunking The False Dichotomy Of High Standards vs Generous Grace At Work
Debunking The False Dichotomy Of High Standards vs Generous Grace At Work
Debunking The False Dichotomy Of High Standards vs Generous Grace At Work
Almost everything in business operates by a standard — whether it's production quotas, revenue targets, success rates, etc. People, however, run on love, grace, and forgiveness. Often, in business, high standards and forgiveness are treated as if they are separate and opposed. Nothing could be further from the truth. Listen as Howard and Carter discuss how high standards of excellence and dispensing grace are synonymous.
Audio Transcript
Business tends to run on standards — yet flourishing in life is dependent on love, mercy, and grace.
Our work life is full of standards. For example, we have a time to be in the office by, time to complete a project, quality of our work, production quotas, success rates, win and loss rates, and revenue targets — everything seems to be measured against a target or best practice.
People, however, seem to run on love, grace and forgiveness. We can all point to a time in our lives where someone’s decision to extend us grace built our self-esteem and made us better — holistically — which empowered us to better contributors to our team, organization, or community.
Organizations need people who are healthy and thriving in order to be successful. This brings us to our questions for today.
Of course, mistakes happen and standards are broken, but as we work with others, how do we know when to focus on the standard of excellence or to generously extend grace, mercy, forgiveness? And, should we treat coworkers, bosses, customers, vendors, and even ourselves any differently?
The question really is whether we are going to focus on the standard or extend forgiveness to that person. And, the key is knowing that both are at play all the time — it’s not a choice between the two. It is a false dichotomy to believe that the standard is separate from or opposed to forgiveness and mercy. You do not have to choose between the two. Rather, what we need to do is evaluate the situation and deploy both to their highest potential — starting with ourselves.
However, we must acknowledge the reality that this is how people feel. Many people feel like letting people off the hook is missing the standard. And, when you word it like that you probably have. Letting people slide has little to do with mercy, grace, or love.
A False Dichotomy
People encounter false dichotomies all day long — we must do things this way or that way. And, to get to the root of the problem, we must know what a false dichotomy is. A false dichotomy is an informal logical fallacy based upon a false premise which erroneously limits what options are available. The fallacy does not consist of the form or structure of the argument. Rather, the problem is in the premise itself — the premise is set up to be false.
In short, a false dichotomy is being forced to choose between two options that are not representative of all your options. For example, people say, “It’s either this car or I’m not driving.” Or, someone might say, “We either go all in on this war or we just focus on protecting ourselves.” False dichotomies are extremely common and all of us are guilty of using this fallacy in our reasoning.
To get better at spotting false dichotomies, stop and think about your options whenever someone presents you with two things to choose from. Think to yourself, “Are there more options than this?”
The false dichotomy we are talking about today is choosing between high standards of excellence at work and extending forgiveness.
What Is Love?
So, to help shine light on this false dichotomy, here’s a quote from one of our favorite philosophers, Dallas Willard, “Love is meant to govern the will, which is meant to contemplate alternatives.” When we are really considering what is loving in this situation, possibilities open up.
So step one to contemplate your alternatives in love. And, whenever we start talking about love, we have to talk about Jesus because Jesus is love-itself. Not only that, but Jesus always holds high standards and always dispenses abundant mercy.
A second dichotomy we must get rid of is separating our faith from our work. Faith and work are not separate. You cannot separate them. The teachings of Jesus are relevant to all of life — including work! Therefore, we must look to Him for what to do in work, not some other standard other than Jesus.
Grace And Truth
With that in mind, consider these verses from John 1:14, “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” The very definition of glory — who embodied very leadership attribute perfectly — is full of grace and truth. Truth is to a standard, and it is not opposed to grace. They exist together in unity within Jesus.
Many people think about grace and truth similarly to how they think about God’s holiness and love. Many people talk about how holiness and love are opposed to each other within God, and that’s simply not true. There are distinctions between holiness and love, but when you get to the bottom of what each of them are you discover a God who is both simultaneously in all of who He is and does. Therefore, holiness and love are not opposites.
And, this God, whose name is Jesus Christ, talked a lot about standards. For example, in the sermon on the mount, Jesus said, “Be perfect as your heavenly Father is perfect.” Yikes! We’ve never been perfect for a single moment. Jesus didn’t lower the standard — He clarified it.
Again, Jesus clarified the standard when He said, “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment… You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” – Matthew 5:21-22; 27-28
The Forgiveness Of Jesus
This is just the tip of the iceberg — look at how Jesus talks about forgiveness. “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14-15). What Jesus is most concerned about is whether we are going to turn around and offer the forgiveness to others that He offered to us.
We have to know how much we’ve been forgiven in order to forgive others. Followers of Jesus have been forgiven of everything. All their sins were paid for on the cross. None of it has to be earned.
To drive this point home, consider these verses in Luke, “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you” (Luke 6:37-38). Here, Jesus is saying that if you are not extending forgiveness to others, you don’t understand how much you’ve been forgiven.
So you have to start with yourself. Do you know how much you’ve been forgiven?
Now, with all that in mind, let’s go back to the case at work where you are trying to navigate the false dichotomy of whether you should appeal to the standard or offer forgiveness.
There are three steps to consider: (1) What is the standard and how is it validated? (2) Is the standard appropriate for that individual? (3) Are you applying grace in both scenarios?
Is The Standard Valid?
Let’s examine the first step. Is the standard validated? If so, how was it validated? For example, in the NBA there is an amount of free throws that players are expected to make. If you are in the NBA, you are expected to meet this percentage standard. If you cannot make the standard, you have to offer another compensating factor. Shaquille O'Neal is a perfect example of this. He tried everything to get better at free throws, but he never got much better. However, Shaq was so good at scoring, rebounding, and defense that they decided to keep him on the team.
Another example is showing up to work on time. Imagine you work at a breakfast restaurant that opens at 6am. Lots of people show up every day for breakfast at that time and if everyone shows up except the cook, no one gets any food. So we have a standard of when you have to show up to work.
Another standard is sales targets. I worked for a mortgage company and we knew how many mortgages each person had to do. The math proved it, and when it wasn’t met, we had to investigate why. Which brings us to our second question.
Is The Standard Appropriate?
Is the standard appropriate for the person you are dealing with? Think back to the freethrow example. Most of us regular people could never meet the NBA free throw standard — no matter how much we practiced.
If the standard is a sales quota, investigate whether the person is doing all the necessary and sufficient steps to achieve the quota. If they’ve followed all the steps to achieve the goal and they cannot meet the standard, they might not be in the right job. Some people just don’t have the gifts necessary for those positions. But, maybe they just haven't had enough reps to know if the sales role is right. If so, test it a little while longer. If you’ve already given them enough reps and the standard is validated, they may not have what it takes for the position.
Grace Applies Regardless
From the beginning to end, we must be gracious. If someone isn’t meeting the standard, we make sure the standard is valid. Then we make sure nothing else went wrong that was outside the person's control. We ask them about it, give them second chances when appropriate, and encourage them. Eventually, if they cannot meet the standard even when they’ve had plenty of chances and are following the steps, it’s likely time for them to use their gifts elsewhere.
But whether they stay or go, it’s our responsibility to be gracious to them throughout the process as we help them meet the standard.
Audio Transcript
Business tends to run on standards — yet flourishing in life is dependent on love, mercy, and grace.
Our work life is full of standards. For example, we have a time to be in the office by, time to complete a project, quality of our work, production quotas, success rates, win and loss rates, and revenue targets — everything seems to be measured against a target or best practice.
People, however, seem to run on love, grace and forgiveness. We can all point to a time in our lives where someone’s decision to extend us grace built our self-esteem and made us better — holistically — which empowered us to better contributors to our team, organization, or community.
Organizations need people who are healthy and thriving in order to be successful. This brings us to our questions for today.
Of course, mistakes happen and standards are broken, but as we work with others, how do we know when to focus on the standard of excellence or to generously extend grace, mercy, forgiveness? And, should we treat coworkers, bosses, customers, vendors, and even ourselves any differently?
The question really is whether we are going to focus on the standard or extend forgiveness to that person. And, the key is knowing that both are at play all the time — it’s not a choice between the two. It is a false dichotomy to believe that the standard is separate from or opposed to forgiveness and mercy. You do not have to choose between the two. Rather, what we need to do is evaluate the situation and deploy both to their highest potential — starting with ourselves.
However, we must acknowledge the reality that this is how people feel. Many people feel like letting people off the hook is missing the standard. And, when you word it like that you probably have. Letting people slide has little to do with mercy, grace, or love.
A False Dichotomy
People encounter false dichotomies all day long — we must do things this way or that way. And, to get to the root of the problem, we must know what a false dichotomy is. A false dichotomy is an informal logical fallacy based upon a false premise which erroneously limits what options are available. The fallacy does not consist of the form or structure of the argument. Rather, the problem is in the premise itself — the premise is set up to be false.
In short, a false dichotomy is being forced to choose between two options that are not representative of all your options. For example, people say, “It’s either this car or I’m not driving.” Or, someone might say, “We either go all in on this war or we just focus on protecting ourselves.” False dichotomies are extremely common and all of us are guilty of using this fallacy in our reasoning.
To get better at spotting false dichotomies, stop and think about your options whenever someone presents you with two things to choose from. Think to yourself, “Are there more options than this?”
The false dichotomy we are talking about today is choosing between high standards of excellence at work and extending forgiveness.
What Is Love?
So, to help shine light on this false dichotomy, here’s a quote from one of our favorite philosophers, Dallas Willard, “Love is meant to govern the will, which is meant to contemplate alternatives.” When we are really considering what is loving in this situation, possibilities open up.
So step one to contemplate your alternatives in love. And, whenever we start talking about love, we have to talk about Jesus because Jesus is love-itself. Not only that, but Jesus always holds high standards and always dispenses abundant mercy.
A second dichotomy we must get rid of is separating our faith from our work. Faith and work are not separate. You cannot separate them. The teachings of Jesus are relevant to all of life — including work! Therefore, we must look to Him for what to do in work, not some other standard other than Jesus.
Grace And Truth
With that in mind, consider these verses from John 1:14, “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” The very definition of glory — who embodied very leadership attribute perfectly — is full of grace and truth. Truth is to a standard, and it is not opposed to grace. They exist together in unity within Jesus.
Many people think about grace and truth similarly to how they think about God’s holiness and love. Many people talk about how holiness and love are opposed to each other within God, and that’s simply not true. There are distinctions between holiness and love, but when you get to the bottom of what each of them are you discover a God who is both simultaneously in all of who He is and does. Therefore, holiness and love are not opposites.
And, this God, whose name is Jesus Christ, talked a lot about standards. For example, in the sermon on the mount, Jesus said, “Be perfect as your heavenly Father is perfect.” Yikes! We’ve never been perfect for a single moment. Jesus didn’t lower the standard — He clarified it.
Again, Jesus clarified the standard when He said, “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment… You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” – Matthew 5:21-22; 27-28
The Forgiveness Of Jesus
This is just the tip of the iceberg — look at how Jesus talks about forgiveness. “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14-15). What Jesus is most concerned about is whether we are going to turn around and offer the forgiveness to others that He offered to us.
We have to know how much we’ve been forgiven in order to forgive others. Followers of Jesus have been forgiven of everything. All their sins were paid for on the cross. None of it has to be earned.
To drive this point home, consider these verses in Luke, “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you” (Luke 6:37-38). Here, Jesus is saying that if you are not extending forgiveness to others, you don’t understand how much you’ve been forgiven.
So you have to start with yourself. Do you know how much you’ve been forgiven?
Now, with all that in mind, let’s go back to the case at work where you are trying to navigate the false dichotomy of whether you should appeal to the standard or offer forgiveness.
There are three steps to consider: (1) What is the standard and how is it validated? (2) Is the standard appropriate for that individual? (3) Are you applying grace in both scenarios?
Is The Standard Valid?
Let’s examine the first step. Is the standard validated? If so, how was it validated? For example, in the NBA there is an amount of free throws that players are expected to make. If you are in the NBA, you are expected to meet this percentage standard. If you cannot make the standard, you have to offer another compensating factor. Shaquille O'Neal is a perfect example of this. He tried everything to get better at free throws, but he never got much better. However, Shaq was so good at scoring, rebounding, and defense that they decided to keep him on the team.
Another example is showing up to work on time. Imagine you work at a breakfast restaurant that opens at 6am. Lots of people show up every day for breakfast at that time and if everyone shows up except the cook, no one gets any food. So we have a standard of when you have to show up to work.
Another standard is sales targets. I worked for a mortgage company and we knew how many mortgages each person had to do. The math proved it, and when it wasn’t met, we had to investigate why. Which brings us to our second question.
Is The Standard Appropriate?
Is the standard appropriate for the person you are dealing with? Think back to the freethrow example. Most of us regular people could never meet the NBA free throw standard — no matter how much we practiced.
If the standard is a sales quota, investigate whether the person is doing all the necessary and sufficient steps to achieve the quota. If they’ve followed all the steps to achieve the goal and they cannot meet the standard, they might not be in the right job. Some people just don’t have the gifts necessary for those positions. But, maybe they just haven't had enough reps to know if the sales role is right. If so, test it a little while longer. If you’ve already given them enough reps and the standard is validated, they may not have what it takes for the position.
Grace Applies Regardless
From the beginning to end, we must be gracious. If someone isn’t meeting the standard, we make sure the standard is valid. Then we make sure nothing else went wrong that was outside the person's control. We ask them about it, give them second chances when appropriate, and encourage them. Eventually, if they cannot meet the standard even when they’ve had plenty of chances and are following the steps, it’s likely time for them to use their gifts elsewhere.
But whether they stay or go, it’s our responsibility to be gracious to them throughout the process as we help them meet the standard.